Wayne Green

Wayne Green

Friday, September 5, 2014

September 5, 2014 - Late Evening

My dad is basically comatose. The coughing that happens for him was making him very uncomfortable so we stepped up the very LOW dose of morphine that we would give when his respirations became too labored. Just to explain a bit here.......My dad has Heart Failure. Specifically congestive heart failure. He also has COPD, Insulin dependent diabetes, kidney failure (after kidney transplant)....as you can see....he is quite the train wreck. He took a licking and kept on ticking.......and ticking.....and ticking.....until now. With his heart condition and the dying process, typically what we see with this type of disease process is that the lungs fill up with fluid and it makes it very uncomfortable to breath. It also causes very noisy breathing that in hospice we often refer to as the "death rattle".  We have been able to succesfully keep his symptoms under control. Most people are afraid of morphine and incorrectly think that by giving it death will come sooner. In reality the morphine used correctly increases the oxygen levels and can actually extend the dying process. Since we have managed his secreations, it is likely that our interventions have worked too well....and he keeps ticking........Somehow, I don't mind it at this moment. Earlier I was afriad that he was suffering and I was contributing to extending that suffering......now.....I am just thankful that my father is lying on the bed in front of me....still breathing.....even if he can't tell me he loves me right now.....somehow I find comfort that his soul remains present with us because I know all too soon his beautiful soul will be ascending to meet the other souls that await him........tick, tick, tick..........

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