Changes. No one expected any of this. There are so many who have been taken by surprise by the speed in which my dad has transitioned. I have some guilt about what I told my family about hospice care. I didn't lie and just for the record I believed that hospice would lengenth his life and improve his quality of life. The research tells us that is true. What I did not think of at the time, nor even consider as a posibility, is that there are some patients that fight so hard to stay alive and carry a heavy burden for those they are leaving behind. When hospice begins for this group of people, often through the hospice care and the family feeling more open to discuss end of life issues, the burden is lifted and the patient is able to relax into what their body has been trying to do for some time which of course is stop working and die. I believe this is what has transpired for my Dad. He loves us all so much and didn't want to leave us. Through hospice and our family discussions with him....his burden was lifted and he has relaxed into the present and quit fighiting so hard.
The changes have been fast. We are thankful for this time with him. for those who have been able to say goodbye. I said earlier today to come today or tomorrow. I just want you to know, if you don't make it before he leaves us, it wasn't that he didn't want to see you, but that he knew you would understand that it was time for his suffering to end.
Again, I have no crystal ball however I do beleive that today is very likely the day that he leaves us. He is stubborn enough to make it longer and that is possible, however the changes from last night to today are significant enough that I beleive his time is far more limited.
I will keep you posted. Please keep my brothers in your thoughts. I think this is harder on them then I anticipated. Pray for saftey for those who are driving to reach him in time. I have been praying for my Dad's Grandma Green to come to him......he loved her because as he told me....she loved him. I want someone that he FELT the same love that he gives to come to him and bring him home.
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