Wayne Green

Wayne Green

Saturday, September 6, 2014

September 6, 2014 - Late night

.......I am not privy to what is in his thoughts, what it is that keeps him ticking.......a few years ago when we talked about his thoughts about being put on a ventilator, he had a strong opinion that if he were ever to be put on a ventilator or life support...............................that there should be a spare machine outside of his room in case the one he is on stopped working. It was a bit of a joke, however I believe it highlights his desire to live as long as he possibly could. 

He obviously doesn't want to go home nearly as badly as I want to go home right now........I don't know what he is gaining by waiting......I do know, after he is gone it will all make sense and I will know..........but right now.......knowing that life is just continuing on as if this man is not dying......makes me feel as if I am in a vacuum....even in this room.....with my family, waiting....out of stress or something.....conversation is just continuing as if there is not a dying man laying in the middle of the room.......It is nearly surreal. They are not being disrespectful.....I am simply somehow disconnected ....... in some form of limbo......between having a father and having lost a father........ 

5 comments:

  1. I Just want to personally thank you thank you catie for the great narration and keeping us up to date on whats going on along with doing an outstanding job caring for grandpa at the same time. You definitely have the heart he gave you n we couldnt ask for a better one!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree completely. Without this blog I would be a nervous wreck wondering what was happening. Thank you and love you all

      Delete
  2. We love you too! And by the way, you spilled the watee your fired! ;) those remarks brought some laughter to us it did me because thats exactly what grandpa would say and his kind of humor! That man always had a joke to tell and laughter to bring!

    ReplyDelete
  3. LOL!! It was a very funny moment! HA! He had the greatest sense of humor!

    ReplyDelete